Editorial: My E3 2017 Predictions (E3 Month 2017 Part 2)

My E3 2017 Predictions

          Alright, it’s time once again to give my predictions for what we’ll be seeing at the six major conferences this year. My rule as always: it’s cheating to predict something they’ve already announced will be there (for example, “new Assassin’s Creed” would be a no-go because we know they’re going to announce it). Plus, it’s more fun to try to figure out the new stuff that’s coming than guessing what’s going to earn a second year at E3 on its belt. With that said…

EA

A Star Wars game that isn’t Battlefront

          EA’s conference is a toughie this year. Unless they pull out a huge surprise, they won’t have a Mass Effect, Battlefield or Titanfall game they can rely on to amaze people this year. Are they going to continue the annual release of screentime given up to EA Sports titles? Or are they going to try to do what Nintendo pulled off last year and dedicate the entire conference to Battlefront II?

          Honestly, neither of those sound like a good idea (although this is EA we’re talking about, and they’re the kings of bad ideas). That’s why I think we’ll be seeing a brand new Star Wars title completely unrelated to Battlefront announced this year.

          Last year we got a laughably bad montage where they showed off all the Star Wars content that they promised we’d get to see for real…eventually. Well, a year’s gone by since then, so one would hope we’d be seeing something from one of those developers this year. 1313 brought back from the dead, anyone?

Bethesda

Doom 2

          They say it’s best to strike the iron while it’s hot. Doom was met with huge praise and success last year (which accidentally introduced the worst review policy ever), so it doesn’t seem like too much of a stretch to think that plans are already underway for round 2.

          While I doubt we’ll actually be getting the game this year (even next year seems like a stretch), I wouldn’t be surprised to see a brief announcement trailer for the sequel this time around. Bethesda hasn’t announced much of their lineup for the next few years aside from Quake Champions, so announcing the sequel to one of 2016’s biggest success stories seems like a plausible route to take.

Microsoft

Halo 6 on Scorpio

          The Xbox One’s been floundering ever since it was first announced, thanks to the initial sales pitch being one of the worst console marketing schemes ever conceived and having a lack of exclusives worth buying an entire console for. Considering this conference will likely be focused on announcing and advertising the new Xbox Scorpio, I’m willing to bet that Microsoft knows they’ll need a Breath of the Wild sized launch game to really push this console.

          And what better route to take than pulling out Ol’ Reliable?

          Halo 5 launched with all the impact of a marshmallow landing on a cotton swab (note to self: need better allegories), so the franchise that set the standard for first-person shooter games is currently trying to crawl its way out of mediocrity. What better way to fix two problems at once by releasing a show stopping Halo 6, available exclusively on the Scorpio?

          Microsoft has announced that a new Halo game won’t be at the conference, and usually when a developer says something won’t be at E3 they stick to their guns. But the Scorpio needs a good game at launch, and having it be Microsoft’s biggest franchise makes the most sense.

Ubisoft

The ultimate dance-off

          I mean, last time they started off with a huge dance number, so they’ve gotta top it this year, right? And what better way to do it than with a massive dance battle onstage?

          I dunno, they already announced all the major games they’re doing this year and it’s too early for sequels to the stuff they talked about last time. There’s nothing I can really say.

Sony

Spyro Remastered

          Sony’s been bringing out a lot of nostalgic licenses from the PS1 days lately for either remasters or new installments. The Crash and Wipeout remasters have a lot of people excited, and fans really enjoyed PaRappa HD. So who’s next to be brought out of the history books?

          People have been asking for this one ever since Spyro became the poster boy for the first Skylanders game, and now that Sony’s gotten all aboard the nostalgia train I think it’s finally his time to shine. While I’m not really familiar with the franchise myself, I think a remaster of the first three games would really make people happy.

Nintendo

Smash Bros. for Switch

          Nintendo’s been doing a great job in maintaining a steady stream of popular IPs coming out for the Switch. We already have Zelda and Mario Kart, and Splatoon 2 and Super Mario Odyssey are due out for later this year. Honestly, having the next step be Smash Bros seems like a no-brainer.

          I wouldn’t be surprised if Nintendo decided to go the Mario Kart 8 Deluxe route with Smash, releasing a “Definitive Edition” of the Wii U/3DS game with all modes included in one package, plus all the DLC included. Throw in a few new characters and stages (Splatoon and ARMS alone would make for a bunch of new content) and Nintendo has a fantastic little game sure to move more consoles.

          So there’s my big predictions for this year’s conference! Odds are I’m right for at least one of them, so there’s that I guess.

          Stay tuned for next time, as I give my thoughts on all the major conferences and decide on who my E3 winner is!

Little Witch Academia Episode 22 Review

Feels

(This review contains MASSIVE spoilers!)

(Seriously, if you haven’t watched the episode yet and you wish to do so, stay away from this review. There’s some “Luke, I am your father” level stuff here)

          The biggest question since the first episode of Little Witch has been if and when Ursula would reveal herself to be Chariot to Akko. We’ve known the two were one and the same ever since the first short, so with the big reveal kind of inevitable as the series shifted gears much further towards Akko and Ursula’s relationship in the second cour it became kind of a guessing game for how the answer would be given.

          This episode gave answers to not only that question, but to multiple others as well, as Croix’s master plan began to unfold. Despite all this, the writers still managed to create an episode packed with Little Witch’s trademark brand of sweetness and humour.

          Honestly, it’s hard to tell where to begin with this episode. The seventh word is on the horizon, but before that can happen Andrew stops by town to return Akko’s hat. I love how Andrew’s finally had stuff to do these past few weeks aside from bail Akko out of some wacky situations she can’t fix herself. The chemistry between the two of them is just fantastic, as we can see in the scene the two of them share where he encourages her to stop trying to be Chariot and start trying to be herself. It’s a lesson she’ll probably be taking to heart after the events of this episode.

          The weird soccer game controversy that’s been popping up these last few weeks also finally got some explanation. It’s the result of a growing animosity between two competing countries, except amplified by Croix. Her master plan is to harness people’s negative emotions to forcefully break the seal on the Grand Triskelion, while at the same time guaranteeing a future for magic even when the old style fades away.

          Croix finally decides Akko is interfering with her plans too much, and targets her with her evil robots. Ursula swoops in to save her, and while doing so lets her disguise slip and reveals herself to be Chariot.

          Now, for most shows this would be a good place to end it. But here’s where Little Witch decided to go full-on Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D on us, leaving a cliffhanger that changes literally everything about the overarching plot of the series.

          After Ursula apologizes to Akko for not telling her sooner, Croix decides to explain why Chariot stopped performing. Similarly to how Croix is currently using magic to control emotions, Chariot used to harness the power of dreams to fuel her magic. The downside is that everyone who she used the dream magic on could never use magic themselves later on.

          This explains so much about the series that most of us never gave a second thought. Why Akko spent so much of the first cour being the worst witch ever and why she can’t ride a broom? Chariot stole her magic. Why Diana grew up alone and friendless because she was so dedicated to relearning magic and becoming a witch worthy of the Cavendish family name? She attended the same Chariot show Akko did. It even explains why Akko, a witch not from a magical family, was accepted into Luna Nova in the first place. Wizarding children are vanishing by the hundreds because Chariot stole their magic.

          This episode also ruined that adorable opening scene in the first episode forever. So there’s that.

          Obviously Akko is more than a little distraught to discover that the idol she’s been searching for for years is the reason why she’s so much worse than all the other Luna Nova students, and the episode ends on that note. Honestly, it’s anyone’s guess where it’s going to go from this point, but considering this is Little Witch Academia, I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s all smiles and magic again before long.

          While I’ve been a little frustrated about how wishy-washy Trigger seems to have been over the Chariot reveal since the second cour started, this episode absolutely made it worth the wait. Everything from the writing to the animation to the music to even how everything was lit was just perfection, and it really gave the episode a stake nothing else before it had.

FINAL SCORE

10/10

Legendary

Re:Creators Episode 9 Review

Magane Fan Club now open for business

(This review contains spoilers!)

          Last week’s Re:Creators continued to finally become more of the show it promised it would be from the beginning, upping the action and mystery while at the same time throwing out the unnecessary overdose of exposition that plagued the first few episodes. This week was a continuation of that same high, as the show focused on one of the most fun and interesting characters in the whole thing.

          The big question from last week was whether Mamika was going to survive her encounter with Altair or not. This question was answered in the cold open with a big and bloody “nope”, as she was brought crashing down to Earth still mortally wounded. What this episode doesn’t tell us is what the consequences of the Magical Splash Flare were. Altair is nowhere to be seen this week, and neither is the gun-toting guy that seems to be her number two. While it’s fairly obvious they’re still alive, one has to wonder what happened to them afterwards.

          Anyways, Mamika dies in front of Magane, with her last wish being for her to tell Alice that they need to side with Meteora to take down Altair. Magane, of course, doesn’t exactly tell Alice the truth, instead flipping the narrative to make it sound like Meteora is the one who killed Mamika and Altair is the one they need to side with.

          A lot of the episode is given up to Magane, and how she’s working to turn all the heroes against each other. It’s been made obvious that she doesn’t care whether the world is saved or destroyed, but rather just wants to have fun messing with everyone. Since Altair has done barely anything at all over the course of the series, Magane is the closest we have to a main villain right now, and she’s a lot of fun. I love the subtle ways she’s able to turn conversations around in her favour and get people to do what she wants. She’s an extremely interesting and fun bad guy.

          Through her we also got hints to Sota’s past, and how he’s done something in the past so that he “can’t see someone anymore”. I think at this point we’ve been given all the puzzle pieces to figure out what happened here. Sota was friends with the girl who created Altair, but the two drifted apart after she became successful. Then he did something to make her commit suicide, which is why Altair targeted him in the first episode. All that’s left is for the show to explicitly tell us the details.

          There’s also an interesting little nugget of conspiracy lying beneath Magane’s lies. What if Meteora is actually working for Altair? She kind of randomly showed up in the first episode alongside her, and it would explain her sudden knowledge of all her plans despite never really coming into contact with her. Plus there’s also the fact that it would help Altair’s plan of making the creations fight each other if she had a double agent working on the other side.

          My one big problem with this episode is a continuing one with the entire series: there are too many characters than they can juggle right now. Selesia is completely absent this week, as is the mech guy who still has done squat. While they don’t really have a place in an episode so focused on Magane, I really wish they’d been given something to do. Why not have Selesia be the one to fight Magane in the end? She’s the most prominent character in the intro and advertising, yet has done basically nothing crucial since the pilot.

          Despite that, this episode is awesome. The writing on Magane turned her from a fun baddie to a truly interesting antagonist, and the way she’s subtly trying to manipulate the narrative is fantastic. Plus, if my Meteora prediction comes true, it’s an awesome little nugget placed early on for the more zealous fans.

FINAL SCORE

9/10

Amazing

Star Wars Saturday: Who is Supreme Leader Snoke?

Who is Supreme Leader Snoke?

          He’s tall, dark and not-so-handsome, but as of right now we don’t know too much about Snoke, the enigmatic leader behind the First Order. He only appears in hologram form in a handful of scenes in Force Awakens and I’ve heard conflicting reports on whether he’ll be more of a major player or not in Last Jedi, furthering the mystery of exactly who he is and why he has such a grudge against not only the galaxy, but specifically the Skywalker family.

          So I thought it’d be fun to go through a police lineup of sorts and see if we can pin down exactly who this mysterious dark side master is. But before we get started…

What we know for sure

          Not much, as a matter of fact. Snoke’s Wookieepedia page is more dominated by a description of his appearance and some behind the scenes facts than an actual description of where he comes from and who he truly is.

          Despite that, there’s a couple things we know for sure from various sources. We know he’s extremely skilled in wielding the dark side of the Force. We know from the Force Awakens novelization that, while he may appear human, he isn’t of the human race (though it’s been suggested that this may just be him tampering with his holographic appearance to hide his true identity). We know he witnessed the rise and fall of the Empire, meaning he’s been around since Revenge of the Sith at the absolute latest. We also know that he’s the one who seduced Kylo Ren to the dark side, leading him to destroy Luke’s Jedi academy.

          Last but not least, it’s implied that he being the true mastermind behind the First Order isn’t exactly a secret. Leia namedrops him when discussing Kylo to Han in Force Awakens, so they at least know who he is. I’d also be very surprised is Luke wasn’t at least a bit familiar with him.

          But that’s really it. Lucasfilm has barely given us breadcrumbs of Snoke’s true identity, leaving the internet with a lot to speculate on and not much detail to utilize.

          So it’s time to go through some of the more popular theories and give my thoughts on who this guy might be.

Suspect #1: An entirely new character

          At this time of writing, this one seems to be the most viable option. Snoke doesn’t bear a strong resemblance to anyone we know from the movies, and he’s played by Andy Serkis, an actor entirely new to Star Wars. Doesn’t exactly match up with anyone else.

          So if he’s not someone we know, who the heck is he?

          A lot of fingers are pointing towards the Unknown Regions, an uncharted area of the Star Wars galaxy that’s never been truly explored. We know that after the Empire was destroyed they retreated into the Unknown Regions to regroup, and there they transformed into the First Order and constructed Starkiller Base. Who’s to say the Empire didn’t bump into Snoke along the way? Maybe he was the one who orchestrated their comeback?

          There’s even more evidence if you read some of the recently released books. We know from them that Thrawn, the blue skinned Grand Admiral of the Empire, was sent out into the Unknown Regions early on in his career to investigate a mysterious threat the Republic detected was lurking there. We don’t know what he found, but the pieces line up with that “mysterious threat” being Snoke. We also know from the Aftermath novels that Palpatine detected “the source of his power” in the Unknown Regions, which is one of the main reasons the Empire journeyed there after his demise. Who better to tip Palpatine off that something sinister is lurking beyond charted territory than Thrawn, one of the highest ranking and most brilliant officers in his cabinet?

          A spirit that embodies an aspect of the Force isn’t exactly a new idea in Star Wars either. Star Wars Rebels recently introduced the Bendu, a spirit meant to represent the balance between the light and dark sides of the force. Could Snoke be the literal manifestation of the dark side?

          So that leaves us with a mysterious figure hiding out in uncharted space, possibly the source of the dark side itself. The Empire discovered him on their travels after being defeated, and he took it upon himself to fix them up and make them better.

Suspect #2: Darth Plagueis

          This is easily the most popular theory out there, and it has quite a bit of evidence behind it. Many fans will tell you that Snoke is actually Darth Plagueis, Palpatine’s Sith master and one of the strongest dark side users in galactic history.

          We know about Plagueis from the famous opera scene in Revenge of the Sith, where Palpatine recounts the Sith legend to Anakin in an attempt to sway him further to the dark side. According to Palpatine, Plagueis was so powerful in using the dark side that he could influence midichlorians to create life, saving those he loved from death. Eventually, he got so powerful that his apprentice killed him in his sleep, that apprentice obviously being Palpatine himself.

          So, let’s look at the facts here. Both Snoke and Plagueis are said to be extremely strong in wielding the dark side of the Force. Snoke’s face looks more than a little torn up, so much so that it’d make sense if an attempt had been made on his life. Also, if Plagueis could create life to save others from death, whoever said he couldn’t do the same on himself?

          The biggest piece of evidence for this theory comes from none other than John Williams himself. Here’s the music that plays during the Plagueis scene in Revenge of the Sith.

          And now here’s the music that plays during Snoke’s first scene in Force Awakens.

          The two are frighteningly similar. Both employ an unsettling “uuuuuuhhh” tone beneath some sinister sounding notes. Almost like there’s a connection between the two.

Suspect #3: Boba Fett

          Now we’re starting to get into some of the wackier theories. Despite what you may think, this one actually holds a bit of ground, despite it being highly unlikely that Fett actually turns out to be the ultimate evil. It also helps us solve that pesky “Rey’s parents” mystery (but that’s a story for another day).

          This theory, by Reddit user “TheReturnofBobaFett”, is based a lot on the similarities Force Awakens shares with the 90’s non-Disney animated fairy tale movie Anastasia. Both stories are about a girl left alone, far away from her family. She’s trapped until she meets an innocent and helpless character who leads her to a young man on the run from his past. The girl and young man go on adventures together until she is kidnapped by the villain. The young man fights for her freedom, ending with him unconscious. The girl then summons a power she didn’t know she had and gets the villain’s weapon before he does. The movie ends with the girl reuniting with her family before leaving again to follow her destiny.

          Sounds pretty familiar, doesn’t it? But how does this lead up to Boba Fett becoming a dark side master?

          The main villain in Anastasia attacks the titular princess because he wants revenge on a family that crossed him long ago. Obviously in this situation that would be the Skywalker/Solo family. This is why he specifically targeted Ben Solo to become Kylo Ren, knowing it’d be a big hit to the original trio. He also orchestrated Rey disappearing (this theory having her turn out to be the long-lost daughter of Han and Leia) to further the divide between the two of them, having Han return to smuggling and Leia go back to politics.

          The only character that’s still alive with such a grudge against the family is Boba Fett, according to TheReturn. It also explains how Snoke knows the name of the Millennium Falcon despite it having gone unused for years by the time of Force Awakens. The Aftermath books hint that Fett survived his encounter with the Sarlacc numerous times. This also explains how Snoke saw the rise and fall of the Empire, as Fett was present at the start of the Clone Wars in Attack of the Clones.

          The only thing this theory missed was that it never really explains how exactly Fett managed to go from being a highly-talented bounty hunter and become a super-powerful dark side user, making me feel that, while there are a lot of interesting points to speculate on here, the end conclusion of Snoke’s identity is a bit of a miss. Still, the full theory is well worth reading here.

Suspect #4: Sith Master Jar Jar Binks

          Let me make something clear here: do I think there’s even a glimmer of a chance that the Lucasfilm story group decided to make one of the most unintentionally despised characters in cinema history the main antagonist of their new trilogy? No way, not a chance. But honestly, the theory’s just too awesome to pass up a chance to talk about it.

          Around the time when Force Awakens hype had reached its peak, Reddit user “Lumpawarroo” (taking his name from a character in the holiday special that shall not be named) posted an extensive amount of evidence that Jar Jar’s character was originally going to turn out to be an accomplice of Palpatine’s in Attack of the Clones, mirroring the reveal in Empire Strikes Back that the hyperactive green thing messing with Luke’s stuff and cooking root stew is actually the greatest Jedi master that ever lived. Of course, after the response to Jar Jar in Phantom Menace was…underwhelming, Lucas went back to the drawing board and removed his story going forward, replacing him with Count Dooku in future movies.

          There’s actually a frightening amount of detail in Phantom Menace that gives away Jar Jar’s true nature. Jar Jar performs several acrobatic feats throughout the film more often attributed to Jedi knights. He also tends to move his hands subtly when talking to others, which often lead to him being promoted in the Gungan army and the Senate.

          If you haven’t checked the theory out, give it a look here. It goes into way more detail than I could here, including how Jar Jar subtly gives young Anakin an early disrespect for Jedi and fans the flames of his love for Padme. Despite there being absolutely no chance that Disney will pull this one out of nowhere for a big reveal in the new trilogy, it’s a real intriguing look at how one of the most disliked characters in all of Star Wars almost became a massive surprise.

          There are several more, but these are the only ones that hold water (Mace Windu, Leia, a reborn Palpatine, and even the reanimated body of Darth Vader all came up as popular theories albeit ones with little backing evidence while I researched this article). Needless to say that this is a topic that’s been hotly discussed ever since the topic first came up. If I were to put my two cents in I’d say that Snoke is most likely the manifestation of the dark side not unlike Bendu from Rebels, although I wouldn’t discount him turning out to be Plagueis. Regardless of who he is, I can’t wait to learn more about who he really is and where he came from.

Steven Universe Reviews: “Wanted”

A review in four parts

(These reviews contain spoiler!)

          There’s a lot to get through, so let’s get started!

Stuck Together

          I’ve been critical of a lot of things on Steven Universe in the past, but if you asked me the one thing I hated the most on the show, my answer would always be how they shoved characters like Lars and Ronaldo down our throats for multiple episodes without really trying to give us something to like about them.

          While I can’t say they’ve done the same for Ronaldo, this episode did the imposible: it made Lars a relatable character that didn’t make me want to tear my ears off after spending 11 minutes with him. Shocking, I know, but they pulled it off.

          Steven and Lars, for the first time in over four seasons, actually had a normal conversation about how they’re both scared of what’s awaiting them. It’s a great scene between two characters who for the most part share more of a SpongeBob/Squidward dynamic than an actual relationship.

          This episode also gave us a fun new character in the form of Topaz. I’ve long joked that Steven Universe could make an axe murderer look sympathetic, and while they didn’t quite go to that extent here, it was a little surprising to see a character who was silent in her first episodes suddenly start crying because of Steven and Lars’ little chat. On the other hand, I liked that she only liked working for Homeworld and Aquamarine because it allowed them to stay fused, and they worry they wouldn’t survive without the other.

          Unfortunately this partnership didn’t last long, as they arrived at Homeworld and Steven and Lars are separated.

          This episode definitely feels like more of an introduction to the bomb than an episode that can really stand on its own, but it’s still a good episode. Topaz is fun, and I like that Lars is finally starting to become a stronger character overall.

FINAL SCORE

8/10

Great

The Trial

          With a title like that, you know stuff is about to get real.

          The meat of discussion topics in the Steven Universe fanbase until the show decides to crawl out from hiatus again will likely come from this episode, because it was jam-packed with everything a fan could want, including the Diamonds, new gems, and even a conspiracy about if Rose really shattered Pink Diamond.

          Before we can really get into the big stuff, there’s a lot of neat little stuff in this episode. First off, the new gem type: Zircons. A blue Zircon serves as Steven’s defense attorney, while a green one serves as the prosecution pandering to the Diamonds. Blue Zircon definitely spends most of the episodes as a fun and goofy bad lawyer stereotype, but towards the end of the episode when she actually blows the lid off of something huge it leads to a great scene.

          It’s also always cool to see the Diamonds again, and I also liked seeing Blue’s more intimidating side that we barely even got a glimpse of in the Out of this World arc. Having her continue the trial after seeing Steven just because she wants to make him suffer as much as possible is really sinister and awesome.

          The trial itself is fun, especially as characters like Lars and even Eyeball Ruby are brought in as evidence and witnesses against Steven’s case.

          Of course, once the fun was over things got really, really interesting. Remember the final scene from Bismuth, where Steven fought Bismuth over the morality of using the Breaking Point? Early on in that scene Bismuth explained that she invented the Point as a way to shatter Homeworld gems because, and I quote, “Rose’s sword couldn’t”. It’s such a small detail that we completely overlooked it. But think about it. If Rose’s sword is unable to shatter a gem, how exactly did she manage to shatter Pink Diamond?

          Even stranger, as Zircon points out, how would Rose get so close to Pink without a Quartz soldier stopping her or a Sapphire predicting it happening? The only logical solution is that whoever truly did it was close enough to Pink to make it happen and then cover it up afterwards, which only the Diamonds really have the authority to do.

          Of course, Yellow is none too happy about this. Rewatching the episode knowing the big reveal it’s fairly obvious that she’s the primary suspect in the crime (she’s trying to hurry along the proceedings and we know she wants to leave Earth and the war behind and move on), so unless White Diamond has something to do with it (she’s still absent, but there’s a big picture of her hovering over Homeworld) it’s fairly obvious that Yellow shattered Pink for whatever reason and blamed it on the leader of an upstart rebellion.

          While a lot of the Wanted arc is focused on building both Steven’s and Lars’ characters, this episode is entirely dedicated to giving fans answers they want, while posing a million more questions at the same time. Before this there was no doubt that Rose was the one that shattered Pink, but now that this discord’s been thrown into the mix I’m really excited to see how this season plays out.

FINAL SCORE

10/10

Legendary

Off Colors

          If the first episode of the arc was meant to make us finally enjoy a Lars episode, this episode is meant for us to forget all the garbage he’s done over the course of the show’s run. Seriously, in just one episode the guy jumped from being tied with Ronaldo for my least favourite character to being one of my favourite townie characters overall.

          Why didn’t we get development on him sooner?

          After escaping the Diamonds, Steven and Lars find themselves pursued by robots deep underground Homeworld. Thankfully, they find a group of “Off Color” gems, who hide in an abandoned Kindergarten out of fear of being shattered by the other gems.

          The Off Color gems are awesome. They all have some sort of weird defect from the normal ones, and they all are super creatively designed and fun. There are conjoined twin gems called Rutlites, a fusion of a Ruby and a Pearl called Rhodonite, a giant caterpillar-like fusion of six gems called Fluorite, and, what might be the funniest new character Steven Universe has ever seen, Padparadscha Sapphire, who can only predict things that already happened. Every line she says is absolute comedy gold, and I really wanted to see more of her.

          It doesn’t take long for the robots to find them, but as they’re only looking for gems, Lars is able to take them on himself. But defeating them comes as a cost, as they explode and Lars dies.

          I’m not kidding. He’s dead.

          It’s actually kind of funny that a character I was complaining about being stuck with for one of the most anticipated arcs of the series made me feel upset when they died. If you told me a month ago that Lars was going to die in the next few episodes of Steven and I’d feel sad about it, I would’ve called you crazy. But his development in the last few episodes leading up to this one plus a fantastically directed scene really sold it for me, even though it was inevitable he’d be coming back. This is a show aimed at kids after all, regardless of how dark it gets at times.

          While this episode is significantly quieter than the rest of the arc, I loved the new gems that they introduced, which were some of the most creative we’ve seen from the entire series. Lars also had more great episodes, really cementing him for me as a character that deserved a lot more development earlier on than they gave him. His death scene especially hit a lot harder than it should’ve considering how much I disliked his character before this arc.

FINAL SCORE

8/10

Great

Lars’ Head

          I’ll admit it: when I saw the last episode of the bomb had Lars’ name in the title I groaned. He really was going to be a major player in this. But honestly, having watched the bomb all the way through, I feel that having the last episode being focused on Lars was the way to go (even though Steven was the true main character).

          Lars is back to life, and now he’s turned pink. He also doesn’t have a heartbeat anymore, so I guess he’s an immortal zombie pink teenager forever now. Oh well, it happens.

          While examining his new features, Steven discovers that he can enters Lars’ hair the same way he can jump into Lion’s mane. Sure enough, inside Lars is the same infinite pink savannah that’s inside Lion, and Steven can even use it to literally walk between home and Homeworld.

          This episode also serves to answer one of Steven Universe’s first big questions: what the heck is up with Lion? While many have speculated that Lion was the remnants of Pink Diamond or even Rose herself, I kind of like having the actual answer be something as simple as “he was a lion Rose used her tears to bring back to life”. While it’s nowhere near as complex as people were hoping, it’s nice to have a quick and simple answer in the tidal wave of questions this bomb posed.

          Of course, this means Lars can’t come home. While I’m glad that this means less episodes with annoying Lars, I think I’ll genuinely miss having this cool Lars around. Granted, I’m sure we’ll be seeing Homeworld much more now that the Crystal Gems have a secret path there, so I don’t think he’s exactly been written off. Plus he still needs to finish up his subplot of his relationship with Sadie, so I don’t think he’ll be trapped for too long.

          So Steven’s back home, he’s reunited with the gems and Greg, and we have no idea when the next episode is airing. Everything’s back to normal.

          While this episode certainly wasn’t the best one of the bomb, it was still spectacular. I loved that after The Trial posed so many new questions we finally got the answer to Lion’s true nature. I also liked that Lars and Steven finally truly cemented the friendship that began way back in Season 1, as instead of doing that chestpat thing they do Lars hugged Steven goodbye.

          There’s still plenty more questions waiting to be answered, including the identity of White Diamond, the chest in Lion’s mane, that weird room in the moon base Garnet hurried Steven past, Pearl’s full backstory, and of course who’s the true culprit in Pink Diamond’s shattering. With Season 5 promising to destroy the status quo, I sure hope it won’t be long before we return to Steven’s universe.

FINAL SCORE

9/10

Amazing

Editorial: Fixing Ubisoft’s E3 conferences (E3 Month 2017 Part 1)

Fixing Ubisoft’s E3 conferences

          Look, a really blurry and messy composition photo made in MS Paint! You know what that means! It’s time once again for E3 Month!

          While we’re not quite at June yet, I wanted to start a little earlier this year considering that this year’s E3 scheduling contrasts with my own, and if I’d stuck to my guns and started doing E3 stuff in June I would’ve had to do this article late in the month when E3’s been over for two weeks and no one cares anymore.

          So it’s time to talk about a certain company that seems to be begging for help when it comes to these things: Ubisoft.

          If there’s one thing people dread during E3, it’s the Ubisoft Conference. While I personally feel that last year’s was an improvement and that Bethesda had a worse show than they did, it was still a complete mess that few enjoyed watching.

          So I thought, to start off this annual event right, let’s play conference doctor and see how I would make Ubisoft’s conferences as hotly anticipated as Sony’s. My one rule is that I can’t change the games announced or add in new IPs of my own creation. They’re advertising the games they make, and I’m the director that has to figure out how to present them.

          If we’re ignoring the games (and trust me, I’ll get to those another day), there are two big problems with Ubisoft’s conferences that need fixing: the emphasis on big personalities onstage instead of the game trailers and demos being presented, and how the trailers themselves are structured. So basically to fix these conferences, we need to burn down everything and start completely fresh.

          Let’s take a trip down memory lane and talk about what needs to go, shall we?

          First off, it’s time to either retire Aisha Tyler or give her a greatly reduced role. She seems like a fantastic person and I love that she’s super passionate about the games despite being a decently big TV star (and she’s definitely better than poor Mr. Caffeine), but she just doesn’t add enough for me to justify keeping her around. After overdosing on her in E3 2015, she took a backseat last year’s event aside from the opening and closing and occasionally coming out here and there for interviews and the like. I can justify having her there for stuff like that, but aside from those if we need someone introducing the different trailers, have it be the developers.

          Speaking of the interviews, we’ll be cutting those out as well. Ubisoft’s 2016 conference was the longest of the five major ones last year, clocking in at a full half hour over the second longest, Microsoft’s. They’ve reached the point where they stuff their conferences so full to the brim with filler content that they go on longer than the ones held by the Big Three companies!

          Let’s look at Ubisoft’s 2016 conference and cut out all the things that need to go. First off, no opening dance number. There are better ways to advertise Just Dance than giving ammo to people who argue video games aren’t an art form.

Then, we cut out all the extended interviews that don’t need to be there. The guy that’s always there to advertise For Honor is the gold standard for how to introduce games at a Ubisoft conference, so everyone should try to emulate his style: get in, introduce the game in an exciting and engaging way, play the trailer/gameplay demo, and then get out to make room for the whatever’s next.

          Next, we need to shorten the amount of time every game gets onstage. Everyone wants their fair share of screentime, but it’s so annoying to have to wait through up to ten minutes of a guy talking about DLC for a game people forgot about after a month. Every game gets up to three minutes of introduction, then their trailer/gameplay demo, and then they’re done. No extra-long skits before the trailer, no bad attempts at humour, just the game and whatever introduction it needs.

          And last but not least, if it has nothing to do with video games it doesn’t belong onstage, so no movies. This was just a thing they did last year when the Assassin’s Creed movie was happening, but if I was in charge they’d never do it again. I’m here to see what’s next in video games. If I wanted to hear movie news I’d watch Comic-Con.

          So that’s how I’d fix the staged stuff. As for the gameplay trailers, there is one major thing I’d like to never see again, and if you’ve been following Ubisoft for the past few years I’m sure you know what it is.

          A few years ago while promoting Rainbow Six, Ubisoft invented an annoying little technique that’s since been come to be known as “the Mic Trick”. For those who don’t know, the Mic Trick is when a trailer features pre-scripted audio of professional voice actors pretending to act like gamers playing the multiplayer matches. This is used to make a sterile game seem far more engaging than it actually is through the power of audio, because if the people in the trailer seem excited and interested, our brains usually pick up that we should be interested as well. It usually backfires (usually thanks to the script being laughably awful and sounding nothing like how a real person talks), but this hasn’t stopped Ubisoft from using it several times since it was first incepted in 2014. Since then we’ve seen the Mic Trick used in several trailers for The Division and most recently in the gameplay trailer for Ghost Recon Wildlands. One has to wonder what multiplayer game they’ll stick it to this year.

          I think it goes without saying that the Mic Trick needs to go, and along with it I also would like to send Ubisoft’s nasty little habit of having E3 trailers looking far more polished than the final finished product sent out the door for good. There’s a reason why people are significantly more skeptical of what they’re seeing at Ubisoft’s conferences than they are at even EA’s, and that’s because of the numerous incidents where a game performing at 1080p resolution and 60 frames per second in the trailer releases oftentimes barely going above 30 frames. The most famous example of this was the Watch Dogs incident from 2014, but they’ve done it multiple times since then.

          And that’s just a few ways I would fix Ubisoft’s E3 conferences if I were put in charge. I really doubt they’ll actually do any of these things, but if they decide that this year’s the time to pull a complete 180 and take inspiration from Sony and Microsoft, I’ll be pleasantly surprised.

          Stay tuned, because next Monday I’ll be giving out my predictions for what surprises we’ll be seeing at the six major conferences this year!

Song of the Week

          Intro - Steep

Little Witch Academia Episode 21 Review

The winding road

(This review contains spoilers!)

          One of the biggest mysteries we’ve dealt with in the second cour is Croix, how she relates to Chariot, and what her malicious plans are. Despite coming in and introduced as the main villain early on in the second half, she honestly hasn’t done much aside from plot in her secret laboratory and send out minions to try and disrupt whatever Akko and friends are doing.

          With the Diana subplot finished, the time has come to get the second to last word out of the way before I assume we begin gearing up for the season finale. The next word is supposedly something you can find only when you stop looking for it, leading Akko to search for it everywhere. Fortunately for her, she gets a tip from the most valuable of sources: Croix!

          According to Croix, the word is at the top of a massive tree. The only problem is that that specific tree blooms pollen that, when touched by a witch, removes all of their magical traits. Even worse, the tree’s preparing to bloom again, meaning now is the perfect time to not go there. While Ursula obviously forbids Akko from going, Croix is more than happy to take her.

          This episode is much darker in tone than pretty much any of the episodes before it, and it fits really well for an episode about Chariot and Croix. We get a further glimpse into their past, and we see how Chariot first got her hands on the Shiny Rod. Croix wanted the Rod so she could become the greatest witch ever, and was jealous that it wasn’t given to her. But, considering the fact that we also got a flashback of the two of them hugging it out towards the end of the episode, I’d say that this is only part of why their relationship fell apart. My other theory is that Croix lost her magic due to the pollen, and Chariot had something to do with it. That’s why she’s so competent with technology, and, if memory serves me right, why we’ve never seen her using traditional magic. Even this episode, she doesn’t use a broom to go through the leylines, instead flying on one of her roombas.

          Akko’s story was also really interesting this week. She finally confirmed that she’s only interested in finding the words because she thinks they’ll lead her to meeting Chariot, and doesn’t actually care about the Grand Triskelion or reconstruction magic. While one of Akko’s biggest character flaws has always been her selfishness, having her say that (to Ursula’s face no less) really gave her an extra dimension of personality as well as a much stronger reason as to why she’s doing all this for Ursula.

          The episode ends with the sixth word being revealed after Ursula manages to save Akko before the spores go off, and the two of them reconcile. Considering that Ursula still hasn’t revealed her true identity to Akko, even after this episode with a lot of tension between the two of them and a massive focus on Chariot’s origin, I’m guessing that Trigger’s saving the big reveal for the final boss battle against Croix. While I’d also really like to see Akko work with Lotte and Sucy to save the day in the end, this second cour’s been much more focused on her relationship with Chariot (compared to the friends-focused first cour), making the big reveal seem like a satisfying way to cap off their storyline.

          Also, Croix is building a dark Shiny Rod. That’s awesome. Moving on.

          This episode was a big tonal change for Little Witch, mostly trading in the bright colours and goofy jokes for a darker look and feel, and it really worked considering the subject matter. Seeing more of Chariot and Croix’s past was really interesting, and I also liked seeing more of the darker side of Akko’s character. And now that the sixth word has been found, it looks like we’ll be getting a four episode finale as Croix prepares to take control. The only thing I wish this episode had was the big Chariot reveal to Akko, but if it isn’t here I’m guessing the writers are saving it for a big moment in the final arc. All and all I really enjoyed this episode, and while I don’t want this series to end, I can’t wait to see what happens.

FINAL SCORE

9/10

Amazing