Editorial: Fixing EA's E3 conferences (E3 Month 2018 Part 1)

Fixing EA’s E3 Conferences

          Well, looks like it’s that time again.

          E3 is almost here, and my annual E3 Month is returning with it! The schedule won’t be changing from last year, but just for clarity’s sake here's the schedule:

Today: E3 Editorial

June 4: E3 Predictions

June 12 or 13: Conference roundup and thoughts

June 18: Best/Worst Trailers

Last year I kicked off E3 Month with an editorial about all the different ways Ubisoft could fix their conferences and start doing shows as hotly anticipated as Sony’s or Nintendo’s. And, much to my surprise, their 2017 conference followed nearly every single suggestion I made. Their show last year ended up being one of the best, even better than Sony’s.

So I figured that if I have these magic powers that I can use to fix crappy conferences, I might as well use them to help out the current crown prince of bad E3.

No, not Bethesda. Maybe I’ll do them next year.

          It’s time for EA’s E3 day of reckoning, as we go over what to fix and change to make their conferences as anticipated as (I can’t believe I’m saying this…) Ubisoft’s. The rules are the same as last time: I can’t change the games being announced, just the way they’re being presented. If I was changing the games we’d be seeing nothing but Mirror’s Edge sequels and single-player Star Wars games.

          If you were to ask any gamer that watches all the conferences at E3, I think you’d find a common ground as to what EA’s biggest problem is: it feels like your dad walked in the room and switched on ESPN half the time.

          While EA Sports kinda has to be at the show for investor purposes (sorta like how Forza for Microsoft and Just Dance for Ubisoft get a spot every year), it boggles my mind why it has to dominate the show every year. At least the other conferences that have to slip in investor-pandering games annually do a good job at getting them out of the way either quickly or early in the show.

          With EA, you get nothing like that. Last year had three separate showcases for Madden 2018, and no, they weren’t all one after another. Also sprinkled in are NBA and FIFA showcases that continue to slow the show down for those who aren’t interested in sportsball, which, let’s be honest here, consists of most of the Twitch audience.

          Because of the rules I can’t excise the sports from the conference entirely, but what I can do is ensure that they’re all combined together into one mega-montage. All the EA Sports content you could ever want, all scrambled together in one. This way the people watching the show for Battlefield or indie games don’t feel like they keep getting interrupted by a different sport every 10 minutes. With a montage we get it all out of the way at once.

          We also won’t be starting the show with EA Sports anymore, nor will we shove it to the end. The end of the show is usually reserved for EA’s biggest holiday season title (typically Battlefield or something Star Wars related), and we’ll be keeping it that way. But opening the show with Madden of all things like they did last year is a huge mistake, as it sets a pretty lackluster tone for the conference going forward.

          EA conferences usually consist of four components: the EA Sports stuff, the annual indie game, the big showstopper game from DICE (which has already been confirmed for this year as Battlefield V), and one other bonus game thrown in there somewhere, like Titanfall 2 in 2016 or the brief glimpse at Anthem we got last year. Why don’t we open with that bonus game again, like they did with Titanfall 2 back in 2016? That gets the core gamers in the audience invested right away and gives them something to talk about on social media when the conference inevitably turns to the sports.

          That’s really EA’s only big problem, but it’s one big problem. It’s reached a point where some don’t even watch the conference live because of how ridiculously overstuffed with EA Sports it has become in recent years. After a truly awful 2017 where the company displayed it’s true colours for all to see and Disney yanking the Star Wars license away from them becoming a very real possibility in the near future, EA needs to earn some goodwill back. And, as we saw from Ubisoft, a great E3 isn’t a bad place to start.

          Thanks for reading! Stay tuned, because next Monday I’ll be going through all seven of the major companies doing shows this year and talking about what I think we’re going to see this year!

This year’s E3 Month is dedicated to John “TotalBiscuit” Bain

Thank you for making the gaming world a better place

R.I.P

Star Wars Wednesday: 10 MORE Great Star Wars Commercials

10 MORE Great Star Wars Commercials

          Ah, the wonderful world of advertising. Back in the days before recording shows and PVRs you were kinda stuck watching commercials for anything and everything during breaks in the shows you were watching.

          And yes, there have been plenty of Star Wars commercials over the years. I’ve already done one of these in the past (check it out hereif you haven’t, it’s one of my favourites), but there are just so many great or weird Star Wars ads that I had to do another one. So let’s get started!

Empire Strikes Back Burger King glasses

Last year I started off by showing Burger King’s first ever Star Wars commercials for glasses themed after the first movie, so it’s only fitting that I start with ad for glasses based on the next one in the trilogy here.

It’s funny how this commercial is night and day from the one for the first movie. The other commercial has a family hanging out in Burger King and getting all excited over the glasses. By contrast this one’s more like “HEY KID YOU LIKE STAR WARS? THEN COME TO BURGER KING AND GET THESE GLASSEEEEEESSSSSS” while everything explodes in the background.

And in keeping with tradition, let’s have a look at what eBay is asking for a complete set of these glasses.

Not as bad as last time, but still…yikes.

Pizza Hut/KFC/Taco Bell Crossover

          Phantom Menace was easily the biggest movie event of the 90’s, and along with it came a lot of wacky tie-in commercials and advertising. But honestly, this one might be the wackiest.

          This commercial feels like the Infinity War of it’s time. Colonel Sanders, the Taco Bell Chihuahua, and some random Pizza Hut delivery lady adventuring through the world of Star Wars? Yes please. I don’t think I’ll ever get over seeing the Colonel wielding a lightsaber.

          There are actually a few other Phantom Menace-themed commercial featuring this trio, so if you’re interested in the continuing adventures of Colonel Sanders and crew definitely keep an eye out for them.

Special Editions Pepsi

          Speaking of Phantom Menace, to build hype for the new movie the Original Trilogy was re-screened in theaters for the first time ever, boasting updated effects that would give viewers a glimpse for what they could expect from the new movies. These versions of the movies would later come to be known as the Special Editions, or, as George Lucas likes to call them, the Only Editions.

          And this is how they decided to advertise them.

          One thing this ad does is make me want to be a theater usher. Not only do you get to watch free movies, but you get a lightsaber too? Sign me up.

Phantom Menace Pepsi

          Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the greatest commercial ever made.

          Seriously, I’m not kidding. I just found this one while writing this article and it’s already probably one of my new favourites. Everything about it is just so perfect.

          A young, unsuspecting boy is rollerblading one day when an out of control Pepsi truck zooms past him. He then has a vision of Qui-Gon telling him that hey, maybe it’s a good idea to chase down this crazy truck. And from there…well, just watch for yourself.

Pringles

          Sometimes even the Dark Lord of the Sith feels snacky.

          Here we see Vader on his way to see his movie, but gets slowed down when he spots a lone can of Pringles in a vending machine.

          So, quick question: what vending machine ever had an entire can of Pringles in it? Like, the full size ones you see at the grocery store. I’ve never seen one of those in a vending machine. Actually, that’s probably a good thing…

          Anyways, an usher steals the Pringles from right under Vader’s nose and eats them right in front of the poor guy’s face. Vader ignites his lightsaber and gives chase. Maybe after he can stop that kid from slurping his Pepsi in the theater next door.

Vader goes to Disneyland

          This one’s more of an internet video than an ad, but I love it and this is my list so I can cheat if I want to. Technically it’s advertising the re-opening of Star Tours, so it’s fair game.

          Vader and his stormtrooper pals are on their way to Disneyland to check out the new and improved Star Tours ride, but the ride is still closed. They instead decide to go and enjoy a fun day at Disneyland while they wait.

          This ad is so great that I really hope Disney doesn’t forget about it for when Galaxy’s Edge opens up. Can we get a sequel? Pretty please?

Dark Chocolate M&Ms

          Despite only appearing in the last 5 minutes of the movie, Vader’s presence in Revenge of the Sith was a massive part of the advertising campaign. As someone who lived through it as a kid I saw Vader’s helmet more than I saw Hayden Christensen’s face in 2005.

          And I distinctly remember one of the biggest tie-ins was M&Ms and their Light Side vs. Dark Side campaign. They introduced limited edition dark chocolate M&Ms, and if you picked those instead of the normal milk chocolate kind you joined the Dark Side…I guess.

          This ad is great, mostly because the Red and Yellow M&Ms are such fun characters. Seeing them interact with wild and crazy characters like Santa Claus and Danny DeVito is great, but seeing them in Star Wars is even better.

Verizon

          I haven’t done many ads from the Sequel Trilogy era mostly because I find that a lot of them are more concerned with selling the product than they are with creating a funny or especially memorable Star Wars-themed commercial. There have been a lot of really good ones, but not many that are worth being featured here.

          This one however is just too perfect to pass up. Honestly, I doesn’t surprise me that slow internet is what might take down the Resistance in the end. Internet companies make Palpatine look like a nice guy in comparison after all.

Japanese Cup Noodle

          …I’m not even sure what to say about this one. Why does Japan get all the weird commercials? First Sea Chicken and now this?

Volkswagen: “The Force”

          Man, how did I forget to talk about this the first time I did one of these lists?

          Back in 2012 this commercial was everywhere. Seriously, it felt like you couldn’t get away from it at times. It was featured on talk shows, there were endless amounts of parodies, and an anti-Volkswagen company made a rebuttal ad featuring a bunch of kids dressed as the hero characters.

          And honestly? Looking back on it now it deserved all the attention it got. This is one of those ads that is looked back upon fondly, and for good reason. It’s really, really sweet and hilarious at the same time. I really wish car companies did more ads like this instead of the generic glamour shots of the car with a pretentious voice-over.

          So those are 10 more great Star Wars commercials! Hope you enjoyed!

Star Wars Wednesday: Star Wars in 1977 (May the Fourth Special 2018)

May the Fourth Special 2018: Star Wars in 1977

          May 25, 1977.

          To some people that’s just an ordinary date. To others it’s the day that movies, and in some cases entire lives, were changed forever. That was the day Star Wars premiered for the first time ever.

          While I can’t give you a first-hand opinion of what it was like to be there for the movie’s premiere in 1977 (I was still about 19 years away from showing up and I don’t have access to a time machine yet), I’ll do my best to capture how it felt.

          As someone who discovered Star Wars about midway through the Prequel Trilogy’s theatrical run, it’s kind of hard to believe there was a time where A New Hope was all there was. No Empire or Jedi, no Yoda, no Lando, no Palpatine or Boba Fett, no Expanded Universe, and certainly no Prequel, Sequel or Anthology films. Vader was Obi-Wan’s fallen pupil that killed Luke’s dad, Leia was the princess of a destroyed world with no ties to our heroes, and the Clone Wars were some mysterious event that took place in the past. It’s honestly kind of weird thinking about it like that.

          But one thing you can’t deny is the instant effect the movie had on popular culture. If you think it’s been tough reserving good seats for Infinity War this past week, imagine what it was like back in 1977 before things like pre-booking tickets existed. Because the movie was so immensely popular you had to arrive there often hours before showtime even started, wait in line until the doors open, and rush in to get the seats you want. Too slow and you ended up sitting in the front and get the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to stare directly up Harrison Ford’s nostrils.

          It was also unusual just how much of a surprise Star Wars was. With something like the previously mentioned Infinity War we had an idea that it was going to be something special, as it was the culmination of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, a franchise that’s been on a seemingly non-stop winning streak since 2014 at the earliest. By contrast, Star Wars came seemingly out of nowhere. The only real precedent we have for it was Jaws from two years prior, and that’s just because it basically invented the concept of the summer blockbuster that Star Wars later perfected.

          The movie was such an instant success that on launch day there were people who had seen it four times already. There were people who would wait in line, watch the movie, then get back in line to watch it again immediately after. George Lucas was famously vacationing in Hawaii the day Star Wars launched, and didn’t discover he was Hollywood’s latest success story until he saw Walter Cronkite reporting on the instant phenomenon in the evening. Only 32 theaters were screening the thing on Day 1, and yet somehow it still became one of the biggest movies ever made on its first day of release.

          And the rest, as they say, is history. Star Wars mania swept the globe like no movie had ever done before. Every product imaginable had characters from the movie plastered on it at some point or another. A cheap sequel Lucas intended to make if the film was a flop as most of the cast and crew predicted it would be was turned into the first Expanded Universe novel as Lucas went to work on a much more ambitious second movie. A holiday special was made the following year in hopes of filling the void between movies (it didn’t). C-3PO, R2-D2 and Darth Vader left their handprints in front of Hollywood’s famous Chinese Theatre. Kenner Toys couldn’t meet the demand for Star Wars action figures in time for Christmas, instead handing out empty boxes with vouchers inside that fans still bought in droves.

          Star Wars has been through many ups and downs over the years. Some would even argue it’s never been as good as it was back when this movie launched. But on that one special day in May 1977, it felt like it had changed everything forever.

God of War Review

Mighty

(This review contains minor spoilers!)

          Let me be honest with something from the get-go: this is my first ever game in the God of War franchise. I’ve always been aware about the series and Kratos’ adventure killing his way through Ancient Greece, but this is my first time actually picking up an installment and playing it for myself.

          And man, if this is what I’ve been missing out on all this time, I have some serious catching up to do on my hands.

          God of War is yet another stupendous inclusion to the PS4’s already strong library of Sony-published exclusives. Blending incredibly satisfying gameplay with a very strong and even heartwarming storyline about parenting and what it means to be there for those you care for, this is one of those rare games that somehow manages to juggle both gameplay and storylines with ease.

          That red-tattooed god-murderer Kratos has fled his homeland and his past, instead deciding to settle down and have a quiet, peaceful life in the realms of Norse mythology. But things go awry when his wife passes away, leaving Kratos to face down his most terrifying challenge yet:

          Parenthood.

          His son Atreus has been left without a mother and one hell of a mission before him: journey with his father to bring his mother’s ashes to the highest peak in all the Nine Realms and spread them there. The game starts with the two of them barely getting along or understanding each other, but the growth that builds between the two of them as the story goes along is nothing short of brilliant.

          Think of it as A Goofy Movie but with less fishing and more frost trolls.

          In all seriousness, the relationship between Kratos and Atreus is absolutely the highlight of the entire experience. How they feel about each other is established in the earliest moments of the game, and it goes on a wild ride from there. It’s hard to talk about it without spoiling some of the major story moments and some of the stuff they go through sake over the course of the game, but I will say that if you’re someone that loves games with engaging stories and characters, this one will be right up your alley.

          And even if you’ve never played a God of War game before, have no fear. This game is clearly meant to be a soft-reboot of the franchise. While Kratos’ past is a part of the story, you don’t need an encyclopedic knowledge of his life to understand what’s going on. Everything is explained in a way that new fans can easily pick up what happened in the franchise before this point while still mainly focusing on this new game’s main story of Kratos and Atreus.

          Graphically this game is nothing short of gorgeous. I played it on a standard PS4 and even then it blew my mind. The landscapes look like photographs, that’s how good they look. It’s honestly stunning.

          Unfortunately with great graphical prowess comes a disappointing amount of graphical issues. I noticed a lot of stuttering, particularly in certain cutscenes and when a lot was happening onscreen at once. There were also times when graphical textures took a little bit of time to appear. I particularly remember the water texture being especially finicky. Maybe it’s just because I played on the standard PS4 instead of the PS4 Pro, but that shouldn’t be an excuse, especially as 4K gaming is still in its infancy.

          I can’t say enough good things about the sound design and music. Composed by Bear McCreary of Battlestar Galactica, Walking Dead and Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D fame, the music is often what captures the most emotion on the journey. It can be both big and intimidating, but it also knows when to be quiet and peaceful. Just like how the game itself expertly juggles story and gameplay, McCreary juggles the epic tones that suit Kratos to the quieter melodies for Atreus with mastery.

          And now let’s move on to the big enchilada: the gameplay. As a first-timer to this franchise I have no frame of reference comparing it to any previous installments, but let me just say that I had a ball with the combat in the game.

          I was actually a little nervous about this game in the pre-release stage because of some videos I saw of the combat. It just looked like your typical beat-‘em-up, where you hack your way through one guy, then the next, then the next, and so on and so on. Upon the insistence of the many 10/10s this game received I made the purchase, but I thought my fears had been realized after I trounced the tutorial boss by repeating a single attack over and over until he collapsed to his knees.

          Much to my relief, this initial disappointment proved to be incorrect, as the combat in this game is truly a sight to behold. Very quickly you are encouraged to experiment and be creative in destroying your enemies, with many different methods at your disposal from minute one and even more unlocked along the way as you progress through the story and level up Kratos. In order to truly decimate your enemies you must use a combination of Kratos’ new Leviathan Axe, his bare fists of fury, and your partner in Atreus to their fullest potential.

          Speaking of the Leviathan Axe and Atreus, let’s talk about them. Using the Leviathan Axe feels just as awesome as it looks in videos of the game. Much like Thor’s hammer Mjolnir the Axe can be thrown and brought back to Kratos when called, making for use in several clever puzzles as well as lots of fun combat. I adored using my trademark move on early-game enemies: charge up the axe to increase its frost powers, throw it into an enemy to leave it in place, use my fists to take down the others, and then bringing my axe back to my hand to deal the finishing blow. It’s just plain awesome.

          As for Atreus, he is the new standard for what a game’s companion character should be. How many times have we seen a character be one or the other: a character that tags along on your quest to benefit the story but does next to nothing in the gameplay, or a partner character that hangs out with you to help you in battle but has little to no part in the story?

          Atreus is a major participant in both the gameplay and the story, and I found myself feeling that his presence in battle made each fight feel more alive. He doesn’t have any of what I like to call “idiot partner moments”, like when a NPC controlled partner character stands around and does nothing or gets stuck in a corner while you have to handle all the dirty work yourself. Atreus will always be right by your side fighting, and the further you get in the game the better of a partner he becomes. While his bow initially serves as an extra bit of damage, it quickly becomes like an extra weapon you carry at all times with its own bonuses and special abilities. Putting Atreus to work is the key to beating some of the more difficult encounters in the game. It also helps that he’s a fully-fleshed out character that goes through a complete storyline from start to finish, and he’s the type of character you’re really left wanting more of.

          As I said before, God of War is yet another modern gaming masterpiece available on PS4. While I have no real way of telling you if it’s better than the originals or not, I can say that playing this game was a complete joy, and I can’t wait to go back to explore the sidequests and new areas I haven’t seen yet. While it isn’t without faults, especially in the graphical department, overall this game is heavenly.

FINAL SCORE

9/10

Amazing